Welcome

Originally published 22/02/21 on Wordpress for the blog Cheeseman Begins

Hi, I’m Dan Cheeseman and this is the first post on my new blog, Cheeseman Begins.

If you’ve found this blog and you don’t already know me, I’m in my thirties, I live in the UK with my wife Alice and baby daughter Sophia (please don't use this information to steal our identities), and I have lots of opinions to share (all my own and not of any company with which I have been employed or affiliated). I won't be focussing on serious or political matters here; this blog will be pure escapism. For example, here are a few of my random opinions:

• Leonardo is the best ninja turtle.

• Pink wine is the tastiest wine, followed by red, then white.

• Art Deco is more pleasing to my eye than Art Nouveau.

• Egon Spengler is my favourite Ghostbuster.

• Corduroy truly is the cloth of kings.

• If forced to choose, I'd pick Sonic the Hedgehog over Mario.

• The Lion King (1994) and Robin Hood (1973) are the best Disney movies.

• The Picture of Dorian Gray is my favourite 19th Century novel.

• Marmite is delicious. I sometimes eat it straight from the jar with a spoon.

Generally, no-one cares what I think. The same may be true with this blog, but at least I’ll enjoy writing it.

Prince John & Sir Hiss, by me

I’ve always been compelled to write. I inveterately kept a diary for 12 years, containing such gems as:

• 'Walls have started making microwaveable sausages. This is a game-changer for me.’

• ‘I got some creosote in my mouth. It tasted horrible.’

• 'A bloke behind me in the queue kept kicking me in the back of my legs. I turned around and gave him a really hard kick. His mate said, ‘Well, that’s fair enough.’’

• 'I was feeling cold and drunk, so I threw myself into a large recycling bin, and snuggled down into some cardboard boxes.’

Every day for eight years, I entertained friends by writing The Book, an illustrated, surreal record of my time at school and uni. I also spent 18 months as a reviewer for the popular website, Batman News . In this blog, I hope to combine the bizarre variety and relaxed schedule of the former with the measured, critical eye of the latter.

By the way, I called the blog ‘Cheeseman Begins’ as an homage to my favourite fictional character. Other name suggestions I received were ‘Hard Cheese,’ ‘Dan Solo,’ and ‘Ballad of a Fat Man.’ You can judge for yourself whether I made the right choice.

Me as Batman in 1993 and 2012

I’m not certain where this blog is headed, which is exactly how I want it. I expect a mixture of my interests will feature. These include drawing, writing fiction, making stop motion animations, playing easy video games, dinosaurs, philosophy, psychology, LEGO, Queen, Bob Dylan, Star Wars and the aforementioned Dark Knight. I have a lot to say about movies, but I’ve never been a film student so hopefully there won’t be too much pretention here (contrary to current trends, I’ve also never demanded that a television or film series reshoots or withdraws their output, because I’m not an entitled brat). I also genuinely look forward to hearing what you think! My opinions aren’t facts; they shouldn’t exist in a vacuum. After reading, let me know your thoughts wherever you’ve found my articles.

A lot of the subjects I’ll be covering are hugely popular so it would be naïve to assume that other blogs aren’t ploughing the same furrow. I suppose everything considered original is actually undetected plagiarism. However, we’re all different so I promise no-one will do it quite like me.

If you need an example of the same idea done differently, look no further than the ‘Twin Films’ phenomenon. With surprising frequency, two different film studios will produce two movies with the same plot or theme, at the same time. Alien invasion movies Independence Day and Mars Attacks! both came out in 1996. A Bug’s Life and Antz (which both feature an eccentric, outcast ant falling for an ant princess, going on a mini adventure and returning home as a hero) were both released in 1998. Sometimes the reason for this is fairly self-evident (Bicentennial Man, I, Robot and A.I Artificial Intelligence came out around the turn of the century, amid concerns around machine ethics and the millennium bug, while Freddy vs. Jason and Alien vs. Predator hit at approximately the same time because the studios that owned these 80’s characters finally ran out of ideas) and some are total mysteries (why did we need two mediocre Snow White movies in 2012?).

Spider-man in Captain America: Civil War and the eponymous heroes of Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, each drawn by me. Both 2016 films involved superheroes dealing with the repercussions of destruction caused in previous movies, getting manipulated by villains, and turning on one another.

I hope you decide to join me on this adventure – but whether you do or not, have a lovely day. :-)